So Tuesday night going home from work THIS happened:
On the left side of the pic you see the bumper is cracked and my license plate is all crinkled up and paint scraped off from metal hitting metal. Which, technically, you can’t actually see very well because F*CK YOU, LinkedIn stalkers!
I fishtailed on 22 South near the “nice” motel. Someplace between “I think I got this” and “Oh SHIT!” my car spun counterclockwise and missed hitting another car or vice versa by a single hand span.
They say you’re not really supposed to over-direct the wheel when you’re fishtailing but had I not – well, my mind can only picture the inevitable soul-crushing outcome of twisted metal, neck-braces, lawsuits and maybe an aneurism. Perhaps a touch of alcoholism if I happen to survive the aneurism…
My car stopped (finally) when it hit the guard rail.
EFF this. From now on as SOON as it starts snowing…I am O-U-T aka Sayonara/Shalom/Aloha/Peace and however-the-fuck else people around this crazy, snowed-in Northeast U.S. say “Fuck it I’m leaving. Dock me or suck my dick. Your choice, really”.
Don’t you also just LOVE IT when you see a really great job ad (sorry, current job; we look just like husbands look at Screw Magazine personals when they’re in the doghouse at home. Wait, is that just MY husband???)… anyway, am I the only one that cracks up when there’s a job ad in the classifieds which specifically says, at the bottom, “Must have reliable transportation”? There are also those that specify that one “must be ready, willing and able to get the job done”; translation – you stick it out, stay late, sleep over, bend over the desk, drive in a snowstorm of historic proportions, etc., etc., etc. to help Company X accomplish their goals/projects.
Company X, Y, Z, F, G and whomever else can just lick between my post-workout, sweaty, sock-linted toes if you think for one tiny second that I will not just walk the FUCK out the next time it starts so much as flurrying. If so much as ONE snowflake falls before I leave or even right after I get to work tomorrow then Buh-BYE, y’all!
My poor 2002 Subaru, my mental health, my heart and even my brand new shovel are all at their wit’s end with this winter. Winter 2015 has done me, my husband and our accumulated vacation-time IN this year.
Now THOR wants a piece!? 😥
Y’know, Thor, I am still kinda/sorta partial to beefy, blonde, magical Viking-types but please take your Mjölnir and your snow & ice and bash some other planet. I mean, what happened to “the protection of mankind”?
More snow!? Really, Thor!!?? WTF!?
I’m a brunette & you like brunettes, right? I’m sure we can work something out…
March 4th, 2015 at 19:57
I hate snow…and I don’t even know what snow is!
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March 4th, 2015 at 20:27
Well since it’s a freak occurrence in your parts consider yourself blessed not to be forced to deal with this:
It sucks! 😦
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March 4th, 2015 at 22:47
Blessings counted!
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March 4th, 2015 at 22:08
I grew up in the suburbs of NYC so I know snow and hate it – that’s why I live in South Florida. Well, no, not really the reason, but I won’t go into that now. I do have 2 words – SNOW TIRES. Not that they work…. and salt your driveway….also, move away. Of course, in the mid 1970’s it snowed down here too, but because it was a “miracle” they closed EVERYTHING! Schools, government buildings, everything!!! Freakin’ babies. Come for a visit!!!
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March 4th, 2015 at 22:34
Hubby and I were just talking about seeing if we could get some standby tickets to Key West!
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March 5th, 2015 at 08:48
Come down before Hurricane season starts! Key West is almost always evacuated. (June through November).
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March 5th, 2015 at 02:03
I’m glad you’re okay! Your new do is too lovely to not be allowed to live! (And the rest of you, of course.) The more I read and hear about this “snow”, the less I like it. I guess it really isn’t like in the Charlie Brown Christmas specials after all, huh? 😛
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March 5th, 2015 at 10:14
Aw, thanks! And snow is only that nice in pictures. And cartoons… 😉
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March 11th, 2015 at 12:42
driving in snow sucks balls – and not in a good way. Glad you are unscathed but the subaru suffers. I am an East Coast escapee out here in the West. The thought of these sun-soaked “folks” attempting to drive in snow and ice conditions terrifies me.
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March 11th, 2015 at 13:15
I’ve been DONE since late January.
Today it is almost 60° in “upstate” NY! It’s like I almost wanna stop wearing socks! …Almost! (I probably won’t be ready to shed them until June.) 😉
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March 17th, 2015 at 16:02
Hmmm…. But I hope, you’ll not limit a speed of your poems! ❤
And, please, take care, OK?
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March 17th, 2015 at 16:43
Aww… thanks so much! Of course I WILL/WON’T! (or vice/versa!) 😉 ❤
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March 17th, 2015 at 18:55
I’ll watch you! 😛
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